Bill Clinton Elected House Speaker

Satire? Yes, for the moment — but that could change

Former President Bill Clinton, pictured here while visiting the UK Parliament at the Palace of Westminster in 1995, is poised to return to a position of leadership in the United States — at least in this satirical story. (Public domain, via Wikimedia Commons)

***** BULLETIN: BILL CLINTON ELECTED SPEAKER OF THE HOUSE *****

WASHINGTON — In a strange turn of events at the Capitol late Friday morning, Rep. Matt Gaetz (R-Fla.) jokingly cast his ballot for former President Bill Clinton — only to have the joke backfire when an unlikely series of events led to Clinton winning the speakership on the 13th round of voting to determine who will lead the House during the 118th Congress.

In the wake of Gaetz’s vote, an additional 18 obstructionist House members sarcastically voted for Clinton as well, guffawing all the while to each other about the great joke they were playing on establishment Republicans. Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-Colo.) even let out a loud “Yee-haw!” after casting her vote for the 42nd U.S. president to lead the House as speaker.

However, House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries (D-N.Y.) invoked a little-known procedural clause, allowing the entire Democratic delegation to vote en masse for Clinton instead of Jeffries, who had been the unanimous choice of Democrats prior to his slick maneuvering to ensure Clinton’s election.

The result?

William Jefferson Clinton will succeed Rep. Nancy Pelosi of California as Speaker of the House.